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Healing Is Messy!


You know, I identify as a healer. Many folks prefer therapist, counselor, guide, etc. But for me, healing is what I do. And I love it. It’s what gets me motivated, it’s what challenges me during the day, it’s what keeps me on my toes, and keeps me aligned with my purpose. I am a healer.


And, it’s messy.


Think of it this way. When a doctor (also a healer), goes into surgery, they have to open up the wound (or parts of the body to get to the wound), be exposed to blood and infection, get to the root, see the issues, then strategically remove it. And, they do remove the issue(s), most times. They also have to close up the body or protective tissues, make some stitches that may/may not lead to scars…and then inform the patient of what occurred. Now, the client is still in pain at this time. Not the same pain as whatever issue/infection/virus caused them to go to the doctor and have the surgery, but a different kind of pain. The pain that comes from healing. Sometimes the pain is internal and one can’t see it but he/she/they can feel it because the pain is still there. Sometimes the pain is external at the incision mark and can be seen by others. They also see the patient scratching the itches, rubbing the burns, or stretching the stiffness. Equally so, there are times when one needs and is in a brace with limited mobility. But all of this healing. The pain, the discomfort, the itching, the rubbing, the stretching, the limited mobility. All of it is uncomfortable…but it is healing…and it’s generally short-term and less painful than whatever took the patient to the doctor’s office/hospital, in the first place.


This is part of therapy too. This is part of the healing journey. The pain and discomfort. The messiness and ugliness. And, most times, it’s only visible to the patient. Others don’t know that one is healing…so they don’t give the grace that is needed when one’s behaviors don’t look like they used to look. And, with equal importance, many clients don’t understand and/or give themselves the grace that is needed during the healing process.


So, as you embark on your therapeutic journey this year (because I know you are already in therapy or thinking about it 😊), understand that the process ain’t all roses and violets. There is going to be some mess, some exposure to infection, some pain, some discomfort, some itching, some limited emotional mobility, and some things you might not want to hear. But the pain of healing is ALWAYS less intense than the pain of what you have already endured. Trust the process. Trust the healing. Now, let’s get to work!


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